Relationships can tell you where you’ve been and they’ll tell you also where you’re going.
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Fearless
In this message, Pastor Barbara teaches practical ways for parents to raise their children by faith and not by fear! We are world overcomers and don’t have to live in fear. God has a great purpose for our lives and He wants to help us answer the call He has placed on us. Now is the time to step out in faith and equip the next generation with everything they need to be successful. God will lead you and guide you every step of the way!
Fearless Transcript
Praise the Lord, friends, and welcome to the broadcast. I’m so glad that you’ve tuned in. We’re teaching from my wife, Barbara’s series, and she’s here today with me teaching on Fearless. And we’re gonna be talking in this broadcast about the value of godly relationships. You know what, relationships can tell you where you’ve been and they’ll tell you also where you’re going. And so you want to stay tuned and receive this good word today. Blessings. Friends, it’s so good to have you today. And I’m so glad that Barbara is with me and we’re sharing from her teaching, Fearless. And we’ve talked about a couple of things. We talked about how important it is for us to have an identity that comes from God, that comes from the scriptures, for us to understand who God says that we are. We talked about the value of the word in that, and today we’re gonna talk about another aspect. So go ahead.
Yes, I’m really excited to be here. Thank you for opening up your home and being with us. Again, we’ve been talking about Fearless and talking about, you know, and not only how do we raise children in today’s society, but even as individuals, how to live victorious. And what we’re really gonna be talking about today is having healthy relationships, understanding, serving one another. It’s so important that all of us, we wanna raise our children this way, our grandchildren, but even as individuals, it’s important to understand aspects of healthy relationships, healthy boundaries. And all of this is in the Word of God. And there’s something I really like in Colossians, and this is 3:17 through 24. And to me, this is just, can I, I don’t know. I’m thinking as a woman, as a wife, but I really think this as a lifesaver. Like when I read this, I thought, I can do this. A lot of what we do in the home or do in the workplace, it can be very repetitive. And so how can you jump outta bed every day excited that it’s a new day and that God’s with me? And this tells us, it says, “And whatever you do, do it as unto the Lord.”
Right.
And I thought, I can do that. I can dust, I can change diapers or I can serve here in our ministry and really do it as unto the Lord. So no matter what kind of people, I don’t know, has anyone here, even on the way to work or on the way to church, had someone cut you off on the road? And you know, and it’s so, it’s just really good to understand, again, about healthy relationships. And I’m gonna do what I’m gonna do with my whole heart, but ultimately I’m doing it as unto the Lord. And so, hun, I like again what it says in Colossians 3:17, “Whatever you do in word or deed do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.” Then it begins to go into all these family relationships, wives and husbands and children. But even it talks about bond servants or how we’re supposed to act in the workplace.
Employees and employers.
Yes.
That’s how we translate that today.
Yes, and so, I’ll start, and hun you might wanna jump in, but then I like how it, to me, I call this the Oreo cookie or the sandwich effect ’cause it talks about all this and then it wraps it up again and reminds us, exhorts and encourage us again, and whatever you do then it says, “Do it heartily as unto the Lord knowing that you’re gonna receive an inheritance.” You know, honey, we’re going to jump into this passage here, but you and I have talked about this. We are not perfect people, but I believe I have served and done it as unto the Lord. And there’s just unexplainable rewards that I have had come to me. And I know it’s from God, that God has seen me, He has seen my heart. You know, I can remember when our children were little and I was at home a lot with them. Nobody was following me around with the camera like reality TV. Nobody was celebrating that I was changing lots of diapers or helping you with the cattle. Nothing I was doing really looked exciting. But you know, I said, Lord, I am doing this as unto you. I’m serving my children, my husband, or serving in our church or even in the community. But God, I’m doing it for you. And I’m not looking for the world to give me any awards, but Lord, I know that you will reward me. And that is exactly what has happened.
Amen. God has rewarded us. And you know, a lot of times, like you said, a lot of what we’ve done doesn’t look exciting. But you know, we’ve just been diligent and we’ve been very consistent. And I know the Bible actually says, “Be followers of those who through faith and patience inherit the promises.” And I had a minister here, Jimmy Alexander, and he’s pastored for years and then he’s traveled and he’s kind of spoken for who’s who in the word of faith circles. And he’s a great minister of the gospel. But Jimmy talked to me about how in Hebrews 10, where it says you have need of patience after you’ve done the will of God, you might receive the promise, that word patience talks about being consistent. And he said, “You and Barbara are some of the most consistent people that I’ve ever seen. And you’re consistently the same.” And you know, we consistently believe God. And you know, we were consist as parents, we’re consistent as pastors, we’re consistent in our everyday life. And that’s really what we’re talking about. And you know, the Lord is gonna reward those who continue to live with faith and continue to live in patience. You’re teaching that you’re talking about is fearless. And we talked about in the beginning of this week how faith and fear are polar opposites. But we don’t have to live in fear when we live by the principles of the scripture. You know, these scriptures that you’re gonna read, that talk about our relationships, talks about wives, talks about husbands, talks about children, talks about employees, talks about employers. In Colossians 3:17 to 4:1, really the same thing Paul addresses it in Ephesians 5:21 through the beginning of Ephesians 6:4 and goes a little bit more in depth, but really in Ephesians, Paul’s talking about how the church can be victorious, how Jesus is already positioned us in a place of victory, and then how we walk that out in this world. And when he talks about the end of how we walk this out, he really goes into relationships because it’s walked out through relationships. You know, most people that fail at their work, it’s not because they don’t have the ability, it’s not because they can’t do the job. 90% of people who fail at a job, it’s not because they can’t do the work, because they don’t have the ability mentally or physically. It’s because they fail in relationships. And so it’s so important for us to keep a good attitude, to keep good relationships. And relationships will help you get where God wants you to go. They can also keep you from it. And you know, the scripture actually says, don’t be deceived. You know, evil communication corrupts good manners. 1 Corinthians 15:33, but then verse 34 says, “Awake to righteousness and sin not.” So, you know, my grandmother told me when I was a little bitty boy, “Birds of a feather flock together.” And then a preacher told me when I was in Bible school and it was actually Dr. Lester Sumrall’s church on a Sunday morning, “Flocks fly the same place.” And so the people that you hang around with, the people that you communicate with, say a lot about you. And you know, evil communications corrupt good manners. You need relationships that help you wake up to righteousness, wake up to God’s way of being and doing right. When you understand that God made you righteous in Christ when you believed on Jesus and you begin to understand what that is from the scripture, you can live that out because Christ is in you. And so praise God because of that. But we need really to walk in victory. Ephesians is written, the first three chapters talks about, who we are, what we have in Christ, we’re seated in a position of victory. The next two chapters of Ephesians 4 and 5 talk about how we walk that out. And then the very end in chapter six, Paul talks about standing against the devil. And a lot of people wanna talk about the devil and talk about all the demonic stuff and all the problems. They don’t really wanna know who we are and what we have in Christ. They don’t really wanna understand how we walk this out. But if you understand first of all who you are and what you have, then you can walk it out and then you can stand against the devil. You know, Watchman Nee wrote a book years ago, “Sit, Walk and Stand”. It’s the book of Ephesians. And he talks about how most Christians get this upside down. They’re trying to stand against the devil so they can walk this life out and hopefully gain the position of victory. Well, in Christ, you begin in a position of victory. And once you begin in this position of victory, then you walk this out, you’re able to walk it out because you’ve been given, by grace, this position of victory in Christ. And you can walk it out and you walk it out in relationships. And then you stand against the devil. So we just got it upside down and it doesn’t work upside down. But when you know who you are and what you have, then you can walk this out and you walk it out in relationships. So go ahead and read those scriptures right here in Colossians 3. It’s talking about the same things Ephesians 5, in the beginning of Ephesians 6 talks about.
Yeah, that was excellent. I’m glad you shared all that. So again, this is Colossians 3:17. Looks like we’re gonna read through 24. And I like, again, we brought this out, “Whatever you do in word or deed do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.” Then it begins the relationships in the home. And I believe this is really talking about godly homes because it says, “Wives submit to your own husbands as fitting in the Lord. So as you submit to the Lord, I’m submitting to you.” So ultimately the Lord is the head of our home. And so praise God. And that goes on and says, “Husbands love your wives and do not be bitter toward them. Children obey your parents in all things for this is well pleasing in the Lord.” And I like how it’s with children, that there’s a promise for a long life in Ephesians where it says, “Honor your father and mother.” And again, I love what Dr. Sumrall brought up ’cause there’s so much going on with family. Different people have different struggles. And I remember someone writing in and say, “How can I honor my father who’s an alcoholic?” And you don’t honor the sin. But Dr. Sumerall brought out, you honor that he is your father. And it’s not that you’re going along or again, honoring the sin, but you honor them as your parent. It’s just in your heart. And but then it goes on and it talks about children obeying your parents. And again, I believe this is in a godly home, a godly setting. And I like how it says in verse 21, “Fathers do not provoke your children unless they become discouraged.” It isn’t about breaking their spirit or trying to make them something. And we’ll bring something else out about the importance of what an arrow is. “Bond servants obeying all things your masters according to the flesh. And not with eye– Did you wanna share something?
Yeah.
Sure.
That means employees.
Yes.
Employees obey your employers. And do that unless they want you to do something that is ungodly.
But I like what it says, “Not just with eye service as men pleasers, but insincerity of heart fearing God.” You know, I liken it, honey, wherever I go with you, you do it here at church, you do it when we’re walking in our neighborhood, if you see trash, you pick it up, you pull weeds here at the church. It’s just in your heart. And like I said, even in the neighborhood, if there’s trash, you pick it up and throw it away. You’re just a servant wherever you go. And in your heart, you just love God. And again, you’re not doing those little tasks because someone’s watching you.
No.
And so I like how it says, “Don’t be not with just eye service, as men pleasers.” When you know the camera’s on and you know someone’s watching you, but it’s a heart relationship there, as a relationship you have with God that ultimately you are going to a whole nother level because of your relationship with God. You are gonna set yourself apart. I remember, we need to wrap this up too, but I remember when our children were teenagers and worked at a Baskin Robbins and they learned something. The older two went first and they learned that when customers walked in, they would purposely make eye contact with the customers and ask them, “How is your day?” And a lot of times they would get really large tips because they didn’t just have their head down or they weren’t just leaning up against the wall like, oh, you want ice cream? And oh, you’re expecting me to come serve you. You know, they acted interested or put some interest in that other person. And you know, their employee loved them. It helped her business. And then it says in verse 23, “And whatever you do, do it.” I love it, now it adds that word heartily. Think about what that word heartily means.
Absolutely.
As to the Lord, not to men.
Listen, you talked about how we pastor, you could consider it a megachurch, right? We got at least a couple thousand people that call this church home and about a thousand a week physically attend. And you know, God’s blessed us and helped us, and I thank God for that. But I’m out here picking weeds. I’m out here planting grass, I’m out here. I do all kinds of stuff. And you know, I pick up trash. I don’t, I pick up trash in my neighborhood. I pick up trash here. You know, I had a guy come in years ago and he’s like, “Well, I just can’t be happy unless I’m in the ministry.”
Wow.
And you know what? I was happy when I was raking horse stalls. You know what, raking horse manure. In fact, it’s a lot easier to deal with that than deal with some people.
Well.
And you know, but we just have this attitude it seems like in, and we’ve raised a generation of people that just wanna gripe and complain. If they don’t get to do exactly what they feel like they’re trained to do, they, you know, listen, I love Billy Joe Daugherty when he was alive. He pastored Victory Christian Center in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Billy Joe and Sharon. Now his son pastors it. But Billy Joe was a great minister of the gospel and he had some pastors conferences that I went to. And you know, Billy Joe said this, “You do whatever it takes.” And if people get that attitude, you do whatever it takes. And I know I had an employee one time and he was kind of upset because he did more. And one day I was out there digging holes to put some light poles in at our last property. And he came out there and he’s helping me. And this is just before he was going, he said, “Well, it all pays the same.” Well, he figured out that lesson, which is a valuable life lesson that you gotta do what it takes. And I think Walt Disney had this attitude that every employee was a janitor. He said, I’ve got how many thousand janitors, how many every employees he had, because it didn’t matter whether you were the president, the vice president, the CFO, if you saw trash, you picked it up. You helped. You became part of the answer and not part of the problem. And when we look at this right here in the word, it says, “Whatever you do, do it heartily as to the Lord and not unto men.” I like to be a productive person. Yesterday we had a holiday before we were here in the church. And you know what? I was at, we worked. You said, “Well, you worked all day.” I said, well, I had stuff to do and I had to get it done. And if I couldn’t get it done, then I’m gonna be behind. And I don’t, my granddad taught me as a young child, stay ahead of your work. And life just works better when you work that way. Now you got a lot more to say, I’ll try to be quiet.
Oh no, I like that.
More in the second half of the broadcast. But a lot of people, you know, they lose their job because they got a bad attitude. They got bad people skills. They walk around half cocked, pouting around, complaining. And if you don’t want, you know, if you wanna get a job, you need to get a good attitude. Put a smile on your face and God will promote you. You know that lady that hired our son, she was Korean and she hired our oldest son Aaron first, and then she hired Andrew when he turned 14. That’s the day he could go to work. She wanted him to go to work. And then she hired Peter the day he turned 14 because she understood these kids have a good attitude. And you know what? If you wanna do well in life, get a good attitude. And if you can’t get a good attitude where you are, you’re not going to keep a good attitude. So praise God. We’re gonna take a short break and we’re gonna be right back after this break, sharing some more things on the value of relationships, helping you get where God wants you to go and be what God wants you to be. Blessings. Friends, I’ve really been enjoying teaching with Barbara on her message, Fearless. I know these messages have the power to help you, just like the Word of God has helped us in our life. And so you can get them absolutely free of charge on our website at CharisChristianCenter.com in downloadable audio or video. Blessings.
When the Word of God says, “In the beginning, God created the heaven and earth.” Amen. I believe the Word of God. And the Bible says, “The entrance of the Word gives light and gives understanding to the simple.” So I take a simple attitude towards the Word of God. When the Bible says it, that settles it.
Friends, I’m so glad that you stayed with us. We’ve been talking about the value of relationships and you’ve been sharing in these scriptures. Man, the scripture is so clear about relationships. Husbands love your wives. And when you read Ephesians 5, it’s like, love your wife as yourself. Love your wife as Christ loved the church. You know, spiritually as Christ loved the church. When Jesus loved us, when we were making all the wrong choices and doing all the wrong things. Love your wife as yourself, emotionally. Become a friend. You used to tell me, “I just wish we were best friends.” And now I think we are best friends.
I said I want you to be my best friend.
Yeah, it’s been 40 years, praise God, in the making, but it’s happened, praise God. And then love your wife as your own body. You nourish her, you care for her. And then it says, “Wives respect your husbands.” Or it says, what? Submit yourself, what does that mean to submit?
Well, and I like, we brought it out just before the break that it tells us in Colossians 3:18, “Wives submit to your own husbands as is fitting in the Lord as you are submitted to the Lord.” But really it’s your heart. It’s where your heart is at.
It’s a heart attitude. It’s a attitude of humility. It’s a attitude of respect. It doesn’t mean blind obedience. You know, if your wife, you know, if your husband tells you to do something that’s sin, you don’t do that.
Because that’s not submitting to him as he is submitting to the Lord.
She’d tell you to go commit adultery, you don’t go commit adultery.
Well, we brought this out. I really believe these scriptures are talking about a godly home because both of us have seen men and women or husbands and wives really abused by the other. And they try to twist these scriptures around. And so we’re trying to bring some light and understanding to that, that these are healthy things. And I just wanted to wrap it up too. We didn’t get a chance to read verse 24, but it goes on to say, “Knowing that from the Lord, you will receive the reward of the inheritance for you serve the Lord Christ.” You know, I talked about in all the different stages of our life, not all of it’s exciting. People weren’t following me around every day. I was changing diapers or helping you with the cattle and getting manure out of the stalls or we’ve built churches, started churches from nothing and helped other people start churches. And you talked about someone who made this comment, I’m not gonna be happy unless I’m in the ministry. And a lot of times people don’t understand, it was a, 20 years I served you and served in full-time ministry for free for 20 years. I wasn’t motivated by the money. I was motivated by God and my love for you. And I just thought it looked like you needed help. But I wasn’t motivated by the bonus package.
Amen.
I just did it because again, I loved God and I loved you and I love what it says, you know, and God knew that I was doing that from my heart. And again–
You know, I wanna say something about that because there’s so many people and they just think, well, if I could just make a living. If you start changing that around and start making a giving, if you make your life about giving instead of living, if you make it about others instead of you, you’ll be well taken care of. But you said, “I wasn’t in it for the money.” And I think we have three main leaders here in our ministry.
Managers.
Under me. Nate Carter, who’s the head of tech and TV, Damon Peterson, who’s the head of finance in the office, and then Aaron, our son who’s over the pastors. And none of these people, I can tell you every one of them, money is not the motivation.
Praise God.
And they’re the highest paid people here. And you know what? It’s money is not motivating them. Money is not driving them or compelling. They’re compelled by their relationship with God. And Aaron, when he came here, he could have, he’s got a doctorate from Rice University. He graduated from Carnegie Mellon with honors, with his BA, got his master’s and doctorate at Rice. Aaron could be making a lot more money out in the world. And yet God has promoted him. God has blessed him. But when he made the decision to come here, he prayed about it for three months, first of all. And he was in Washington, DC, kind of at the top of his field, hand picked to be there at this special event, in music playing for 7,000 people at his event with four of the top players in the world. And yet he called me and said, “It’s not about a position, it’s not about a paycheck.” And I literally believe I could not pay him. And God would bless him and help him and he would prosper. And Nate Carter the same way. Nate makes money outside of the church. Makes a lot of money. And he comes here and gives me 110%. I don’t care about it. And you know, people are shocked that somebody with his talent level, with his ability would work at a church. But see, it’s not about all the money. And God’s blessed him and helping him.
Praise God.
And Damon Peterson, the same way. Damon is not, he’s motivated by how efficient he can be. And Damon is super, super efficient at his job here and does a tremendous job. And I am so thankful for these people. But you know, here’s how, when you get people with this servant attitude and they’re not in it, it’s not eye service, it’s not being a man pleaser, but it’s because they fear God and they have God given gifts and talents and they’re able to take the whole organization to a new level. Praise God. Moses, who we’re talking about ultimately this week, had God-given talents, God-given abilities. His mother helped him see them. He was developed in Egypt, which was the largest empire of the world. He was set up really to be the next prime minister or the next pharaoh. That’s what they were looking for him to be. He was raised in Pharaoh’s house by Pharaoh’s daughter with the best education that money could buy. And yet he chose to serve God. He chose to do, go the, you know, his God-given destiny. And you know me, we started out pastoring. We didn’t make much money, but God blessed us. Man, God helped us, gave us 10 times.
Amen.
What having a big salary would’ve done. I mean, God has blessed us over and over. And when you keep God central, man, it just brings blessing in every area. So you get this attitude and put God first.
Well, you know, I keep thinking about, again, we have a couple more scriptures, but in 24 where it says, “You’ll receive a reward and inheritance for serving the Lord Jesus Christ.” I’m just thinking about even the home we currently live in right now. We bought it, it was a bank foreclosure and it needed some TLC, but we live in a neighborhood that most homes would probably cost 2 or $300 a square foot. Where our home, the Lord blessed us. We bought it, purchased it for like 67 a square foot. So my point is, God has done amazing things and provided for us.
Amen.
Above and beyond what we could have asked for. And it’s really because I believe He saw our heart. And–
You know, Mark Hankins would say it’s a tither’s blessing or it’s a giver’s blessing.
Amen. I like that.
And he’s used those words. And Mark’s on my board. He’s a great man of faith, a great giver. Praise God. And we’ve been giving over the years. In fact, it’s amazing what we give and God’s made it so we can do it.
Well, praise God. You know, we’ve been talking about healthy relationships and there’s some things that you brought out. You brought a lot out in Ephesians. But Ephesians 6:4, I feel like we just need to share this really quickly. It says fathers in another translation. You know, take them by the hand and lead them. And we’re talking about leading them to the truth, the truth of God’s Word. Hebrews 10:25 tells us, “Forsake not the assembling of yourselves together as the manner of some is.”
Praise God.
As you see the day approaching.
Amen.
It’s so important who we have relationships with.
Amen.
Because evil communications corrupts good manners.
Who is first? Is God first when we get paid. Is God first of the week. Is God first thing every day in the Word. Teach your children that and let God be the first.
Amen.
Praise God. Having said all that, praise God, we’ve got hundreds of hours of teaching that we’ve made available free and downloadable curriculum for your kids that we’ve made. You can use it in small groups, you can use it in homeschool, you can use it as a Bible study. And we’ve made this available on our website at CharisChristianCenter.com. It’s our partners that have made this available. If you’d like to partner with us, we’d like to say a great big thank you. And if you need prayer, we have trained ministers waiting to receive your call today. Thank you and God bless you.
There are practical ways for parents to raise their children by faith and not by fear. Now is the time to step out in faith and equip the next generation with everything they need to be successful. We’d like to bless you with the digital copy of Fearless, a $5 value, free of charge. You can download it today at CharisChristianCenter.com.
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